Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough
by Angel of the Moon
Summary: Clow/Yue Shonen-Ai songfic to 'Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough' by Patty Smyth. Deals with emotions at Clow's death


Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough  
By:Angel of the Moon  
Disclaimer: The song isn't mine. It belongs to Patty Smyth and Glen   
Burtnik, along with whatever company published it. Characters belong to  
CLAMP and Nelvana.  
Authors Note:Okay, this is my first song fic and my first posted fic, so   
I don't think it's going to be very good, but I heard this song on the   
radio the other night and just had this idea pop into my head for a fic.  
I'll probably re-do it later, but for right now, this is how it is.  
Anyway, read and please review, since this is my first fic I've actually   
recieved honest feedback on, I need to know how to change my writing   
style.  
  
I don't wanna lose you,  
I don't wanna use you  
just to have sombody by my side  
  
Clow Reed stood out by a large bank window in his bedroom, staring out   
at the night sky. He looked back at his bed and sighed, seeing the man   
lying there, his long silver hair spilling over the side of the bed, his  
wings lying beside him. He knew Yue loved him. He knew Yue thought he   
loved him back. He knew he really didn't. Not the way Yue wanted him to.  
  
And I don't wanna hate you  
I don't wanna take you  
But I don't wanna be the one to cry  
That don't really matter to anyone, anymore  
  
Clow sighed again, turning from the window and lying down beside his   
lover. He looked over and contemplated the face of the man he had gotten  
used to seeing every day for the past couple years when he went to sleep.  
His face saddened as he thought about what he was about to do to him. He  
was about to hurt him deeper than anyone else was able to. Clow felt a   
tear well up in his eye, but forced himself to erase that from his body.  
'After all,' he thought, 'It's better I do this now than later, when he   
might be more attatched. I can't stay alive forever.' With that thought   
in his mind, he slipped off to sleep.  
  
But like a fool I keep losing my place  
And I keep seeing you walk through that door  
  
The next morning, Clow woke up, to see Yue walking out the bedroom door   
quietly. He looked over at the window and saw an empty glass sitting   
there. 'What's that doing there?' he thought to himself, before he   
remembered the night before. 'Oh yes, I must tell them my decision   
today.' He stood and quickly dressed, walking calmly out the door to his   
study. He summoned his creations and a few seconds later, Keroberos came   
bounding in the door, followed at a slower pace by Yue. "Good morning,"   
he greeted.  
"Good Morning Clow-sama," responded Kero cheerfully. "What did you need   
us for?"  
"I wished to inform you of a decision I reached last night."  
"Yes Master, what is it?" Yue asked calmly.  
"I have decided, the time has come, for me to die."  
"What??????" exclaimed Kero and Yue indignantly.  
"But, Clow-sama, why? You could easily live for many more years."  
"I have grown weary of this world Keroberos. I wish to move on."  
"But, Master, what about us?"  
"I have chosen a new master for you. When they come, you will know."  
"But I don't want another master!!! I only want you!!!!!"  
"You will love this new master just as much as you loved me."  
"No!!! I will never love another as I love you!!!!!!"  
"Yue, if you wish, you may choose the new master, judge whether they are   
worthy of your protection."  
"If that is to be my duty, I will not choose anyone. Then you will have   
no choice but to return to us!"  
"You will be the judge Yue. Keroberos, you will be placed in charge of   
guarding the cards until someone comes along you feel is worthy of   
taking the test."  
"Yes Clow-sama."  
"Yue?"  
"No Master, I refuse!!" he yelled, turning and walking rapidly out of   
the room.  
  
But there's a danger in loving somebody too much  
And its sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust  
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are  
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough  
  
Yue walked along through the gardens at Clow's mansion, simply walking   
and thinking. 'How could he do this to me? Doesn't he know I will never   
love another? Why doesn't he understand that he is the only person who   
will be worthy of the title master to me? Why must he leave me like   
this?' Yue heard a twig crack behind him and sensed his master   
approaching. He quickly spread his wings and flew up into the air,   
escaping from Clow.  
  
Now I could never change you  
I don't wanna blame you  
Baby you don't have to take the fall  
  
Clow stared up at the retreating form of Yue sadly, wanting to chase   
after him but respecting his need for privacy. He sighed and turned to   
go inside. 'Yue...I didn't want to hurt you, that was never my   
intention. I am tired Yue, why don't you understand that? I am tired of   
this existance, of living. You did nothing wrong, why do you insist on   
blaming yourself? You do not make me want to leave. I wish I didn't have  
to do this Yue.' He walked back inside his home to begin the final   
preperations for his death.  
  
Yes I may have hurt you  
But I did not desert you  
  
Yue walked into the bedroom he shared with Clow that evening, expecting   
it to be empty. Rather than that, Clow was sitting in a chair, staring   
out the window again. He turned, sensing Yue's presence and waved him   
over. Yue obeyed and stood beside his master. "Yue," Clow said quietly,   
not looking directly at him, "You need to understand something about   
this."  
"What is it master? You are leaving me, what more is there to understand?"  
"Yue, I am not leaving because of you. I am not trying to hurt you,   
although I clearly am."  
"Then why are you leaving me master?"  
"I am not leaving you Yue. I will always be here, watching over you."  
  
Maybe I just want to have it all  
It makes a sound like thunder  
It makes me feel like rain  
And like a fool who will never see the truth  
I keep thinking something's gonna change  
  
"Master, I don't understand. Why are you leaving then?"  
"I am tired Yue. I can no longer go on living in this world. It is   
difficult for me to explain, as you are immortal, but I will try to   
explain.  
"I have seen things in my lifetime, that most people never see. I have   
seen my parents die, my brothers and sisters die, my neices, nephews,   
cousins, and aunts and uncles die. I watched as people I had known since  
childhood slowly grew older and died, while I stayed the same. I have   
seen things no person wants to, or should, have to see. And now, after   
three hundred seventy-six years of death, I am tired of it. I have   
grown weary of seeing people around me die. I no longer wish to see it.   
The time has come for me to go join my family. Someday Yue, I hope you   
will understand."  
"I will try to understand Master, but I still do not wish for you to   
leave. I want you to stay here forever, with me."  
"You have always known I would leave someday."  
"Yes, but I thought you would change your mind!! I thought you would   
decide to stay once you saw how much I loved you!!!"  
  
But there's a danger in loving somebody too much  
And its sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust  
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are  
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough  
  
"I know how much you love me Yue. I love you as well. I cannot, however,   
stay with you. It is love that forces me to leave Yue. I do not wish to   
ruin your life by staying here any longer. I have already scarred you   
enough."  
"But, Master..."  
"No Yue," he said in a forceful tone, "I will not stay. I will die   
tomorrow and the next day, you will be sealed into the book along with   
Keroberos. That is the only thing I can do now Yue. Good night." Clow   
moved to the bed and laid down, falling asleep quickly.  
  
And there's no way home  
when it's late at night and you're all alone  
Are there things that you wanted to say  
  
Yue awoke at midnight that night with a distinct feeling that there was   
something wrong. He looked beside him and saw Clow lying still. The   
blood drained out of his face and he leaned over, checking his pulse.   
He sat down heavily, having felt no pulse. Clow was dead. A single tear   
drew a wet path down the side of his face before being violently dashed   
away by the moon guardian. He gently kissed Clows cold lips before   
standing and leaving the room. He stepped into Keroberos' room and shook   
him from his slumber. "Keroberos, our master is dead."  
Keroberos sat up sharply and they moved into the room, where Yue gently   
lifted Clow's form and moved him out to the preperation room, where he   
set him down gently before the two left the room, after going through   
the ritual.  
  
Do you feel me beside you in your bed  
there beside you where I used to lay  
  
Back in his room, Yue lay back down on the bed, unable to sleep. He   
sighed heavily, looking over at where Clow was lying just hours before.   
'Master, why did you have to leave? I miss you already.'  
'Yue,' came a voice in his mind.  
"Master?" he said questioningly.  
'Yes Yue. I have not left. I am still here, always with you. I will   
always be right beside you.' Yue sighed contentedly as Clow continued   
to speak to him and he slowly drifted off into a soft slumber.  
  
And there's a danger in loving somebody too much  
And it's sad when you know it's your heart they can't touch  
There's a reason why people don't stay who they are  
Cause baby sometimes love just ain't enough  
  
Yue awoke calmly the next morning, standing and moving out of the room,   
meeting Keroberos in Clow's study, where they found the Clow book, the   
cards stacked neatly inside. Yue placed his hand on the back while   
Keroberos placed a paw on the front and a sudden warmth enveloped the   
two. A soft white light surrounded the two and when it dissipated, they   
were gone, in their places inside the book.  
  
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough 


End file.
